1
00:00:02,437 --> 00:00:03,527
[Knock on door, door opens]

2
00:00:03,612 --> 00:00:05,142
Hey, Dee dees.

3
00:00:05,222 --> 00:00:06,832
I'm not interrupting
anything, am I?

4
00:00:06,919 --> 00:00:08,199
No, melon ball.
I'm just leaving.

5
00:00:08,225 --> 00:00:09,745
I'm going to meet
drew and the nanny

6
00:00:09,835 --> 00:00:12,875
at his new "mommy,
nanny, and me" class.

7
00:00:12,969 --> 00:00:15,319
He got kicked
out of his old class

8
00:00:15,406 --> 00:00:18,016
for throwing his juice
box at another child.

9
00:00:18,105 --> 00:00:19,885
Nonsense. The reason drew left

10
00:00:19,976 --> 00:00:21,756
was because he
was understimulated

11
00:00:21,847 --> 00:00:23,847
and needed a more
advanced group.

12
00:00:23,936 --> 00:00:27,806
That's the official
story. We're sticking to it.

13
00:00:27,897 --> 00:00:29,157
He drew blood.

14
00:00:29,246 --> 00:00:31,026
You say blood, I
say grape juice.

15
00:00:31,118 --> 00:00:33,028
Official story.

16
00:00:33,120 --> 00:00:35,430
Wow. I wish my mom had rewritten

17
00:00:35,513 --> 00:00:36,993
some childhood stories about me.

18
00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:38,140
Instead she told my problems

19
00:00:38,168 --> 00:00:39,558
to anybody who'd listen.

20
00:00:39,648 --> 00:00:41,428
Ah, that's just part
of Phyllis' charm.

21
00:00:41,519 --> 00:00:43,219
Actually, that's
all of her charm.

22
00:00:46,611 --> 00:00:51,181
♪ Through this
journey of discovery ♪

23
00:00:51,268 --> 00:00:55,878
♪ you're finding
you, I'm finding me ♪

24
00:00:55,968 --> 00:00:59,148
♪ now that I have
someone special ♪

25
00:00:59,233 --> 00:01:01,283
♪ who brings out the joy ♪

26
00:01:01,365 --> 00:01:02,365
♪ brings out the joy ♪

27
00:01:02,410 --> 00:01:05,800
♪ inside of me ♪

28
00:01:05,891 --> 00:01:08,071
♪ we can become
whatever we want ♪

29
00:01:08,155 --> 00:01:10,365
♪ all we need is lovin', yeah ♪

30
00:01:10,461 --> 00:01:13,861
♪ that's the way I
feel it should be ♪

31
00:01:13,943 --> 00:01:16,213
♪ you and me ♪

32
00:01:16,293 --> 00:01:19,383
[Off-key] ♪ me ♪

33
00:01:24,736 --> 00:01:26,606
And after you
finish all the tracks,

34
00:01:26,695 --> 00:01:27,995
we'll sit down with Kai

35
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,958
and we will pick
out your first single.

36
00:01:30,046 --> 00:01:31,266
It's gonna be hard to choose.

37
00:01:31,352 --> 00:01:32,352
Yeah, we love them all.

38
00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:33,750
Well, fortunately, at delicious,

39
00:01:33,832 --> 00:01:35,252
we have a very effective
procedure for choosing

40
00:01:35,269 --> 00:01:36,359
our releases.

41
00:01:36,444 --> 00:01:38,714
Yeah. Kai says,
"release that one."

42
00:01:38,794 --> 00:01:40,324
And we do.

43
00:01:42,014 --> 00:01:43,974
Hey, baby.

44
00:01:44,060 --> 00:01:45,500
Ma, what are you doing here?

45
00:01:45,583 --> 00:01:46,933
Well, I wanted to talk to you

46
00:01:47,019 --> 00:01:48,369
about your mother's day present.

47
00:01:48,456 --> 00:01:50,336
Well, the ultimate present
would be a grandbaby.

48
00:01:50,371 --> 00:01:51,911
But to do that, she'd
have to get pregnant.

49
00:01:51,937 --> 00:01:53,217
To get pregnant,
she'd have to have sex.

50
00:01:53,243 --> 00:01:54,703
To have sex, she'd
have to have a man.

51
00:01:54,723 --> 00:01:56,513
And she ain't got no man.

52
00:01:56,594 --> 00:01:58,074
Ma!

53
00:01:58,161 --> 00:02:00,421
Hey, I'm no happier
about it than you are.

54
00:02:00,511 --> 00:02:01,731
So anyway,

55
00:02:01,817 --> 00:02:03,267
now for years I've
worked with the charity

56
00:02:03,297 --> 00:02:04,397
bay area mothers for others.

57
00:02:04,428 --> 00:02:05,818
Oh, I'm aware of
your involvement.

58
00:02:05,908 --> 00:02:08,478
You gave them 5
bags of my clothes.

59
00:02:08,563 --> 00:02:10,913
Well, they were ugly.

60
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,480
So this year, since i'm
on the planning committee,

61
00:02:13,568 --> 00:02:15,068
I signed both of us
up to work on their

62
00:02:15,091 --> 00:02:16,221
mother's day telethon.

63
00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:17,960
We get to spend the
whole day together

64
00:02:18,050 --> 00:02:19,100
and do something nice

65
00:02:19,182 --> 00:02:20,842
for underprivileged single moms.

66
00:02:20,923 --> 00:02:22,273
That's your present to me.

67
00:02:22,359 --> 00:02:24,359
'Cause I found that box of candy

68
00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:25,188
you were gonna give me...

69
00:02:25,275 --> 00:02:26,705
Ain't cuttin' it.

70
00:02:26,798 --> 00:02:28,248
That wasn't for you.
That's my earthquake

71
00:02:28,278 --> 00:02:29,928
chocolate.

72
00:02:30,019 --> 00:02:32,239
Hey, I watch that
telethon every year,

73
00:02:32,326 --> 00:02:34,106
and I love the weather
guy who hosts it.

74
00:02:34,197 --> 00:02:35,887
Gavin storm.

75
00:02:35,981 --> 00:02:37,291
Ohh. I love it when he's outside

76
00:02:37,374 --> 00:02:39,034
and the wind's blowing
80 miles an hour.

77
00:02:39,115 --> 00:02:41,595
His hair never moves.

78
00:02:41,683 --> 00:02:43,293
That's talent.

79
00:02:43,380 --> 00:02:44,660
Well, if it's good
enough for Gavin,

80
00:02:44,686 --> 00:02:45,986
it's good enough for me.

81
00:02:46,078 --> 00:02:47,358
I'll be your brother for others.

82
00:02:47,384 --> 00:02:49,044
A brofo.

83
00:02:49,125 --> 00:02:50,255
Ohh!

84
00:02:50,344 --> 00:02:51,364
Well, how about you, Adam?

85
00:02:51,388 --> 00:02:52,688
We could use some more bodies.

86
00:02:52,781 --> 00:02:54,191
Well, if I had a dime
for every time somebody

87
00:02:54,217 --> 00:02:55,827
said that to me...

88
00:02:55,914 --> 00:02:57,444
Fine, I'll tell my mom

89
00:02:57,525 --> 00:02:59,785
it's my mother's
day gift to her, too.

90
00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:01,615
Ooh, that way I can
keep the mink eyelashes

91
00:03:01,703 --> 00:03:03,233
I got her.

92
00:03:03,313 --> 00:03:05,493
Hey, Tiffany, Serena,

93
00:03:05,576 --> 00:03:07,176
maybe you guys could
perform on the show.

94
00:03:07,230 --> 00:03:08,230
It'd be your first gig

95
00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:09,578
since signing with the label.

96
00:03:09,667 --> 00:03:11,147
Sounds like a great cause.

97
00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:12,354
And the exposure won't hurt.

98
00:03:12,409 --> 00:03:15,279
Ooh, my Mona's
really something, huh?

99
00:03:15,369 --> 00:03:17,069
It's hard to believe
she was a late bloomer

100
00:03:17,153 --> 00:03:18,683
with a lazy eye and
corrective shoes.

101
00:03:20,461 --> 00:03:21,641
Ma, do you always have to say

102
00:03:21,723 --> 00:03:23,203
whatever's on your mind?

103
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:25,680
Of course. It's
part of my charm.

104
00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:29,602
[Knock on door, door opens]

105
00:03:29,687 --> 00:03:31,647
Look who I found
hiding from your mother

106
00:03:31,733 --> 00:03:33,133
in the hallway.

107
00:03:35,302 --> 00:03:38,442
Oh, daddy, did mother
drag you out shopping again?

108
00:03:38,522 --> 00:03:40,312
She's at the boutique
down the street.

109
00:03:40,394 --> 00:03:42,134
She said she wanted my input.

110
00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:45,012
What she wanted was my wallet.

111
00:03:45,094 --> 00:03:46,794
Well, I'm glad you're both here.

112
00:03:46,878 --> 00:03:49,188
I've decided that mother
and I are gonna volunteer

113
00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:50,532
for that telethon, too,

114
00:03:50,621 --> 00:03:52,191
that is if you all don't mind.

115
00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:54,015
Mind? You giving
of your time instead

116
00:03:54,103 --> 00:03:55,153
of spending my money?

117
00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:58,055
I love it.

118
00:03:58,150 --> 00:04:00,630
Well, mothers for others
is a good organization,

119
00:04:00,718 --> 00:04:02,198
and I can always use

120
00:04:02,285 --> 00:04:03,765
some more charity
points on my resume.

121
00:04:03,852 --> 00:04:05,422
Well, do you think
your mom will do it?

122
00:04:05,506 --> 00:04:09,246
Oh, Mona. Telethon
means televised.

123
00:04:09,336 --> 00:04:13,246
She will break out her
best wig for this puppy.

124
00:04:13,340 --> 00:04:16,080
[Beeping]

125
00:04:16,168 --> 00:04:18,558
Oh, that's my accountant
with a 911 page.

126
00:04:18,649 --> 00:04:19,559
Your mother must have moved on

127
00:04:19,650 --> 00:04:21,350
to the jewelry section.

128
00:04:22,523 --> 00:04:25,353
Here. Take my wallet.

129
00:04:25,439 --> 00:04:26,979
If I don't have it,
maybe I can slow down

130
00:04:27,005 --> 00:04:28,565
the spending.

131
00:04:29,921 --> 00:04:31,101
[Door closes]

132
00:04:31,183 --> 00:04:32,493
Daddy trusts me with this?

133
00:04:32,576 --> 00:04:34,316
What was he thinking?

134
00:04:36,711 --> 00:04:38,631
Ahem.

135
00:04:38,713 --> 00:04:40,723
[Laughs]

136
00:04:43,587 --> 00:04:45,517
Phyllis: And since you'll be
working the phone bank today,

137
00:04:45,546 --> 00:04:47,976
we need to go over
procedures for taking donations.

138
00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:49,850
Now first, we'll talk
about how to deal

139
00:04:49,941 --> 00:04:51,031
with annoying people.

140
00:04:51,116 --> 00:04:53,076
Hello, hello.

141
00:04:53,989 --> 00:04:55,429
On your feet, people.

142
00:04:55,512 --> 00:04:57,652
La diva has entered.

143
00:04:57,732 --> 00:05:00,172
Mmm. Mmm.

144
00:05:00,256 --> 00:05:01,516
You're late.

145
00:05:01,605 --> 00:05:04,215
But fabulous. So I forgive me.

146
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,574
Well, look, you've missed...

147
00:05:05,653 --> 00:05:06,483
Oh, don't worry, phyl,

148
00:05:06,567 --> 00:05:07,787
I already know everything

149
00:05:07,872 --> 00:05:08,922
I need to know.

150
00:05:09,004 --> 00:05:09,744
The president of
the organization

151
00:05:09,831 --> 00:05:10,831
filled me in

152
00:05:10,919 --> 00:05:12,069
when he graciously assigned me

153
00:05:12,094 --> 00:05:14,144
the phone with the
most screen time.

154
00:05:14,226 --> 00:05:15,916
You spoke to kwaku?

155
00:05:16,011 --> 00:05:18,321
I can't even get his
secretary to answer my e-mail.

156
00:05:18,405 --> 00:05:19,745
Wait a minute.

157
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:21,681
You bribed him with a
big donation, didn't you?

158
00:05:21,712 --> 00:05:25,332
You say bribe, I
say gently urged.

159
00:05:25,412 --> 00:05:26,562
Can we just get
back to the meeting?

160
00:05:26,587 --> 00:05:27,407
Absolutely.

161
00:05:27,501 --> 00:05:29,071
But can I just say

162
00:05:29,154 --> 00:05:30,724
these refreshments
are not acceptable.

163
00:05:30,808 --> 00:05:32,198
When I chaired the Tucson

164
00:05:32,288 --> 00:05:34,248
march of the dimes,

165
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,994
we did a smidge better
than instant coffee

166
00:05:36,074 --> 00:05:38,384
and snack mix.

167
00:05:38,468 --> 00:05:40,398
Well, I'm sorry we don't
have your breakfast liquor,

168
00:05:40,427 --> 00:05:44,037
but feel free to
pull out your flask.

169
00:05:44,126 --> 00:05:46,076
Come on, people.
Can we just focus?

170
00:05:46,171 --> 00:05:47,481
I'm sorry, Phyllis.

171
00:05:47,564 --> 00:05:48,854
We can't hear you.
Can you turn down

172
00:05:48,870 --> 00:05:52,050
your outfit?

173
00:05:52,134 --> 00:05:55,624
These needy single
mothers are counting on us.

174
00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:57,013
And you are the
woman to lead us,

175
00:05:57,095 --> 00:05:58,575
since being needy and single

176
00:05:58,662 --> 00:06:02,012
has always been your specialty.

177
00:06:02,100 --> 00:06:03,950
And you can help with the
pregnant and single women

178
00:06:03,972 --> 00:06:07,112
since that was your specialty.

179
00:06:07,192 --> 00:06:08,242
What? Ma.

180
00:06:08,324 --> 00:06:10,154
This revelation shrouds my idol

181
00:06:10,239 --> 00:06:12,199
in a hideous scandal.

182
00:06:12,284 --> 00:06:15,684
I've never loved her more.

183
00:06:15,766 --> 00:06:17,046
You weren't pregnant
with me before

184
00:06:17,072 --> 00:06:18,942
you were married.

185
00:06:19,030 --> 00:06:20,640
Right, mom?

186
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:23,078
Mom?

187
00:06:23,165 --> 00:06:24,775
Oh, my god, it's true.

188
00:06:24,862 --> 00:06:25,992
Oh, wait.

189
00:06:26,081 --> 00:06:28,081
Dee Dee's a love child?

190
00:06:28,170 --> 00:06:32,130
That's hot!

191
00:06:32,217 --> 00:06:34,307
So, that story you told me

192
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:37,094
about being conceived
on your honeymoon

193
00:06:37,179 --> 00:06:39,959
in a cabana on a white,
Sandy beach in montego bay

194
00:06:40,051 --> 00:06:41,051
wasn't true?

195
00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:42,659
Well, your father and I

196
00:06:42,750 --> 00:06:45,930
did have Jamaican
jerk chicken that night.

197
00:06:46,014 --> 00:06:47,584
I can't believe you
would keep something

198
00:06:47,668 --> 00:06:49,058
this important from me!

199
00:06:49,147 --> 00:06:51,107
Dee Dee, honey, you
have to understand.

200
00:06:51,193 --> 00:06:52,463
Dee Dee!

201
00:06:52,542 --> 00:06:54,542
Ok, thanks,
everybody, for coming.

202
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:56,851
We'll see you this
afternoon at the studio.

203
00:06:56,938 --> 00:06:58,328
Wait. I'm confused.

204
00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,848
Ok, see, big Dee
Dee wasn't married

205
00:06:59,941 --> 00:07:01,161
when she and Charles got...

206
00:07:01,246 --> 00:07:02,596
Uhh! I know that.

207
00:07:02,683 --> 00:07:04,643
I still don't know how
to use the damn phones.

208
00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:10,080
Ma, I cannot believe

209
00:07:10,125 --> 00:07:11,735
you could be that insensitive.

210
00:07:11,822 --> 00:07:13,912
And I can't believe you
ended my meeting that way.

211
00:07:13,998 --> 00:07:15,448
Well, I didn't want
to say what I have to

212
00:07:15,478 --> 00:07:16,698
say to you in public

213
00:07:16,784 --> 00:07:18,534
because I have tact...
Unlike some people...

214
00:07:18,612 --> 00:07:20,142
And I know when to
keep my mouth shut

215
00:07:20,222 --> 00:07:21,352
unlike some people.

216
00:07:21,441 --> 00:07:24,231
Yeah, that big Dee
Dee is a loud one.

217
00:07:24,313 --> 00:07:25,663
Not her. You.

218
00:07:25,749 --> 00:07:28,709
Hey, I've thrown that
unwed and pregnant bomb

219
00:07:28,796 --> 00:07:30,186
at big girl plenty of times.

220
00:07:30,275 --> 00:07:31,625
It's one of my favorites.

221
00:07:31,712 --> 00:07:34,672
I especially like to use
it during the holidays.

222
00:07:34,758 --> 00:07:35,998
Yeah, but did you have to do it

223
00:07:36,020 --> 00:07:37,380
in front of Dee
Dee and a room full

224
00:07:37,413 --> 00:07:38,633
of strangers?

225
00:07:38,719 --> 00:07:40,169
Well, how was I supposed
to know jumbotron

226
00:07:40,198 --> 00:07:41,938
hadn't been honest
with her daughter.

227
00:07:42,026 --> 00:07:43,196
All I did was tell the truth.

228
00:07:43,288 --> 00:07:44,988
Whether you knew
it was a secret or not,

229
00:07:45,073 --> 00:07:46,513
it wasn't your truth to tell.

230
00:07:46,596 --> 00:07:48,686
Now look what you
did. You hurt Dee Dee.

231
00:07:48,772 --> 00:07:50,252
And if you want
truth, here's some:

232
00:07:50,339 --> 00:07:53,819
I'm fed up with you
and your big mouth.

233
00:07:53,908 --> 00:07:56,168
I know you didn't just
speak to me like that.

234
00:07:56,258 --> 00:07:57,518
That's right. 'Cause I'm not

235
00:07:57,607 --> 00:07:58,777
speaking to you at all.

236
00:08:00,958 --> 00:08:01,958
Come on, Dee, let me in

237
00:08:02,003 --> 00:08:03,183
so I can explain.

238
00:08:03,265 --> 00:08:04,785
I don't want to talk to you.

239
00:08:04,875 --> 00:08:06,745
Please. I'm begging.

240
00:08:06,834 --> 00:08:07,884
It's mother's day.

241
00:08:07,965 --> 00:08:09,965
I'm down on my knees.

242
00:08:10,054 --> 00:08:11,364
No, you aren't.

243
00:08:11,447 --> 00:08:12,797
Ok, I'm not.

244
00:08:12,883 --> 00:08:14,453
My dior stockings would snag.

245
00:08:14,537 --> 00:08:16,097
But it's the
thought that counts.

246
00:08:17,409 --> 00:08:19,459
Go away!

247
00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:21,072
Come on, Dee, open up.

248
00:08:21,152 --> 00:08:22,302
Don't make me use your sister's

249
00:08:22,327 --> 00:08:23,327
brawny shoulders

250
00:08:23,372 --> 00:08:24,772
to knock down the door.

251
00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:27,770
Mona's out there?

252
00:08:27,855 --> 00:08:29,505
Yeah, Dee Dee, I'm here!

253
00:08:29,596 --> 00:08:31,286
Maybe she'll talk to me.

254
00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:32,470
I doubt it.

255
00:08:32,555 --> 00:08:33,875
She refuses to
even open the door.

256
00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:39,079
This is going to be

257
00:08:39,170 --> 00:08:41,650
a beautiful mother's
day memory...

258
00:08:41,738 --> 00:08:44,218
When I retell it.

259
00:08:47,918 --> 00:08:49,398
What are you doing?

260
00:08:49,485 --> 00:08:52,135
Getting rid of all
reminders of my mother.

261
00:08:52,227 --> 00:08:53,747
Dee Dee, Dee Dee,
anger is one thing,

262
00:08:53,837 --> 00:08:55,197
wasting a deliciously
nutty liqueur

263
00:08:55,230 --> 00:08:57,320
is another.

264
00:08:57,406 --> 00:08:58,886
Suddenly I'm questioning

265
00:08:58,973 --> 00:09:00,283
everything.

266
00:09:00,365 --> 00:09:01,625
Were my parents really in love?

267
00:09:01,715 --> 00:09:03,845
Is my name really Dee Dee?

268
00:09:03,934 --> 00:09:08,034
Am I really a size zero?

269
00:09:08,112 --> 00:09:09,982
I'm sorry my mom told you,

270
00:09:10,071 --> 00:09:11,701
though I always wondered
if keeping it from you

271
00:09:11,725 --> 00:09:13,415
was the right thing to do.

272
00:09:13,509 --> 00:09:14,639
You knew?

273
00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:16,158
Would it upset
you more if I did?

274
00:09:16,251 --> 00:09:17,301
Yes!

275
00:09:17,382 --> 00:09:19,652
Then I am as shocked as you are.

276
00:09:19,733 --> 00:09:21,303
Mona, how could you not tell me?

277
00:09:21,386 --> 00:09:23,126
Well, nobody actually told me.

278
00:09:23,214 --> 00:09:24,694
I just did the math

279
00:09:24,781 --> 00:09:26,911
and it wasn't my
place to tell you.

280
00:09:27,001 --> 00:09:29,051
So everyone knew but me.

281
00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:30,963
How you must have
pitied poor little Dee Dee,

282
00:09:31,048 --> 00:09:34,178
product of her parents' lust.

283
00:09:34,269 --> 00:09:36,449
It's not like it's
such a big deal.

284
00:09:36,532 --> 00:09:38,362
Well, if it weren't
such a big deal,

285
00:09:38,447 --> 00:09:39,637
then why is everyone treating it

286
00:09:39,666 --> 00:09:40,796
like a dirty little secret?

287
00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:42,544
Oh, it's a dirty, little secret.

288
00:09:42,625 --> 00:09:44,795
I just said it
wasn't a big deal.

289
00:09:44,888 --> 00:09:48,198
♪ I can't describe how ♪

290
00:09:48,283 --> 00:09:51,633
♪ I need you, want you ♪

291
00:09:51,721 --> 00:09:53,981
♪ and I'm missing you ♪

292
00:09:54,071 --> 00:09:55,771
♪ oh, I ♪

293
00:09:55,856 --> 00:09:57,136
♪ I wanna know
what it feels like ♪

294
00:09:57,161 --> 00:09:59,731
♪ to love you ♪

295
00:09:59,816 --> 00:10:02,556
♪ again, sometimes,
but I know why ♪

296
00:10:02,645 --> 00:10:05,205
♪ I won't get the
chance to say ♪

297
00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:08,910
♪ that I'm sorry
for what I did... ♪

298
00:10:08,999 --> 00:10:10,039
Dee Dee,

299
00:10:10,131 --> 00:10:11,131
I am so sorry...

300
00:10:11,175 --> 00:10:12,915
I'm taking pledges here!

301
00:10:14,526 --> 00:10:17,046
Your phone's not ringing.

302
00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:18,968
Well, his is.

303
00:10:19,053 --> 00:10:21,533
Hello. Mothers for others.

304
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,541
♪ What was meant to be ♪

305
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:28,193
♪ and now our fairy tale
has no happy ending ♪

306
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:30,409
♪ and I left with no good-bye ♪

307
00:10:30,499 --> 00:10:34,849
♪ no reason why
our love should end ♪

308
00:10:34,938 --> 00:10:38,938
♪ and now I know what
you meant to my life ♪

309
00:10:39,029 --> 00:10:40,899
♪ I wanna know
what it feels like ♪

310
00:10:40,988 --> 00:10:43,988
♪ to love you ♪

311
00:10:44,078 --> 00:10:47,998
♪ again, sometimes,
but I know why ♪

312
00:10:48,082 --> 00:10:49,652
♪ I won't get the
chance to say ♪

313
00:10:49,736 --> 00:10:50,866
♪ that I'm sorry ♪

314
00:10:50,954 --> 00:10:54,524
♪ for what I did and I ♪

315
00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:57,180
♪ dream and look to the sky ♪

316
00:10:57,265 --> 00:10:58,955
♪ baby, believe me ♪

317
00:10:59,049 --> 00:11:05,099
♪ I know that you hear my cry ♪

318
00:11:05,186 --> 00:11:08,536
[Applause]

319
00:11:08,624 --> 00:11:11,544
Oh, yes. Yes!

320
00:11:11,627 --> 00:11:13,107
Great!

321
00:11:13,194 --> 00:11:14,464
Yes, delicious records'

322
00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:15,853
newest singing sensation...

323
00:11:15,936 --> 00:11:19,366
Tiffany and Serena.

324
00:11:19,461 --> 00:11:21,251
And we'd like to
thank our host...

325
00:11:21,332 --> 00:11:22,382
[coughs]

326
00:11:22,464 --> 00:11:23,684
Our handsome host,

327
00:11:23,770 --> 00:11:25,050
channel 6 weatherman
Gavin storm.

328
00:11:25,075 --> 00:11:27,115
Ha ha! You're too kind.

329
00:11:27,208 --> 00:11:28,988
Thank you. Good-bye.

330
00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:32,079
Hey, wasn't that truly inspiring

331
00:11:32,169 --> 00:11:33,209
on such a beautiful day,

332
00:11:33,301 --> 00:11:35,431
high 72, low tonight 56.

333
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:36,910
And I hope they've inspired you

334
00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:38,440
to open up your
hearts, your wallets,

335
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:40,090
and your umbrellas.

336
00:11:40,177 --> 00:11:42,437
Chance of rain in the P.M.

337
00:11:42,527 --> 00:11:45,837
Yes, $100 is generous,
but for only $400 more,

338
00:11:45,922 --> 00:11:47,532
you get 2 tickets to
Adam benet's latest

339
00:11:47,619 --> 00:11:48,709
one-man show,

340
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:52,485
Filipino follies.

341
00:11:52,581 --> 00:11:54,631
Ok. 10 bucks it is.

342
00:11:55,453 --> 00:11:57,723
Yeah, I'm the cute
mocha guy with

343
00:11:57,804 --> 00:11:58,984
the great smile.

344
00:11:59,066 --> 00:12:01,286
How did you know that?

345
00:12:01,372 --> 00:12:02,812
I'm on right now?

346
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:06,770
Your donations to
mothers for others

347
00:12:06,856 --> 00:12:09,856
provide services for single
moms who need it most.

348
00:12:09,946 --> 00:12:11,746
And after all, isn't that
the least you can do

349
00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:13,648
for the woman who
stands by your side,

350
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,173
who loves you unconditionally,

351
00:12:15,256 --> 00:12:17,126
the woman who gave you life?

352
00:12:18,215 --> 00:12:20,905
How can I get me
one of those moms?

353
00:12:21,001 --> 00:12:22,831
But we need more...

354
00:12:22,916 --> 00:12:24,656
More money for
those valued women

355
00:12:24,744 --> 00:12:26,184
we simply call...

356
00:12:26,267 --> 00:12:28,267
♪ Mom ♪

357
00:12:28,356 --> 00:12:29,676
Even though my mother
and I haven't spoken

358
00:12:29,705 --> 00:12:30,875
for 11 years.

359
00:12:30,967 --> 00:12:33,447
Nonetheless, I still
love her and I wish

360
00:12:33,535 --> 00:12:35,575
that pride and a
restraining order

361
00:12:35,667 --> 00:12:38,847
didn't keep me from the
woman who gave me life.

362
00:12:38,932 --> 00:12:41,152
And a head of hair rated
by weatherman monthly

363
00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:44,758
as "best hair in the bay area."

364
00:12:44,851 --> 00:12:45,851
Hey.

365
00:12:45,895 --> 00:12:48,545
I'm still not talking to you.

366
00:12:48,637 --> 00:12:50,677
Even if I came to apologize?

367
00:12:50,770 --> 00:12:53,380
Really? Wait, is this a trick?

368
00:12:53,468 --> 00:12:55,338
Lure me into a false
sense of security

369
00:12:55,426 --> 00:12:56,576
and then tell
everybody here about

370
00:12:56,601 --> 00:12:57,691
my crooked pinky toe?

371
00:12:59,648 --> 00:13:01,168
Look, Mona,

372
00:13:01,258 --> 00:13:03,648
I never meant to hurt Dee Dee,

373
00:13:03,739 --> 00:13:05,279
and I know I'm not
the most tactful person

374
00:13:05,306 --> 00:13:06,516
in the world, but...

375
00:13:06,611 --> 00:13:08,181
And don't say "it's
part of my charm."

376
00:13:08,265 --> 00:13:09,915
Well, it is.

377
00:13:10,006 --> 00:13:12,696
And it's also a
part of who I am.

378
00:13:12,792 --> 00:13:14,202
My mother never
sugar-coated anything.

379
00:13:14,228 --> 00:13:16,138
She just said it like it was.

380
00:13:16,230 --> 00:13:19,710
It made me strong, so
that's how I raised you.

381
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:21,169
Yeah, but don't you
ever wish that grandma

382
00:13:21,191 --> 00:13:22,021
weren't so blunt?

383
00:13:22,105 --> 00:13:25,065
Only every damn day.

384
00:13:25,152 --> 00:13:27,592
Oh. Good point.

385
00:13:27,676 --> 00:13:28,716
I'm sorry.

386
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,248
I really will try to do better.

387
00:13:31,332 --> 00:13:34,422
Thanks, ma.

388
00:13:38,469 --> 00:13:39,819
Sorry about you and your mother.

389
00:13:39,906 --> 00:13:42,036
Oh, I just said
that to stimulate

390
00:13:42,125 --> 00:13:44,515
donations.

391
00:13:44,606 --> 00:13:46,776
Mother and I are
actually very close.

392
00:13:46,869 --> 00:13:49,129
We share a duplex in San Jose.

393
00:13:49,219 --> 00:13:51,609
I have the bigger bedroom.

394
00:13:51,700 --> 00:13:52,480
Really?

395
00:13:52,570 --> 00:13:53,570
Uh-huh.

396
00:13:53,658 --> 00:13:55,098
My daughter here was conceived

397
00:13:55,182 --> 00:13:57,622
to do you know the
way to San Jose?

398
00:13:57,706 --> 00:13:59,136
Ma, you're doing it again.

399
00:13:59,229 --> 00:14:01,119
What? I didn't tell him
it was playing on the car

400
00:14:01,144 --> 00:14:04,104
radio at the time.

401
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:05,671
Aw. What's the
use in having those

402
00:14:05,757 --> 00:14:06,847
Egyptian cheekbones

403
00:14:06,933 --> 00:14:09,463
if you're not gonna
contour them?

404
00:14:09,544 --> 00:14:11,944
Come on, sister
friend. Take your brush.

405
00:14:12,025 --> 00:14:13,215
What does it matter,
if my own daughter's

406
00:14:13,243 --> 00:14:15,723
not talking to me?

407
00:14:15,811 --> 00:14:18,031
May I help you?

408
00:14:18,118 --> 00:14:20,468
Just checking. Still flawless.

409
00:14:20,555 --> 00:14:22,165
The perfect storm.

410
00:14:25,168 --> 00:14:27,078
Some people are so vain.

411
00:14:27,170 --> 00:14:28,220
I know.

412
00:14:29,607 --> 00:14:32,307
As I was saying, I don't
know if I can hold this

413
00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:33,813
telethon together when
i'm in so much pain.

414
00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:35,089
Oh, how could anyone?

415
00:14:35,178 --> 00:14:38,228
But the ill-attired,
single moms need me.

416
00:14:38,312 --> 00:14:39,972
True. The show must go on.

417
00:14:40,053 --> 00:14:42,193
Oh, I just don't know.
What should I do?

418
00:14:42,272 --> 00:14:44,712
I hate seeing my diva down.

419
00:14:44,796 --> 00:14:46,926
Maybe you should try
talking to Dee Dee again.

420
00:14:47,016 --> 00:14:48,336
You know, this whole
mother-daughter conflict

421
00:14:48,365 --> 00:14:49,535
is giving you worry lines,

422
00:14:49,627 --> 00:14:51,717
and that concerns me.

423
00:14:51,803 --> 00:14:55,163
I don't have a line on my face.

424
00:14:55,242 --> 00:14:59,202
Could you find your own mirror?

425
00:15:02,858 --> 00:15:05,508
Daddy, what are you doing here?

426
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:08,040
Your mother called and
told me what happened.

427
00:15:08,124 --> 00:15:10,084
So, how are things going?

428
00:15:10,170 --> 00:15:13,040
Well, fine. Terrific.
Never better.

429
00:15:13,129 --> 00:15:16,649
Are you really my father?

430
00:15:16,741 --> 00:15:18,741
Well, how do you
expect me to feel?

431
00:15:18,830 --> 00:15:20,110
I discover after all these years

432
00:15:20,180 --> 00:15:23,880
that my very existence
is based on a lie.

433
00:15:23,966 --> 00:15:25,876
Sweetheart, let me
try and put things

434
00:15:25,968 --> 00:15:28,138
in perspective.

435
00:15:28,231 --> 00:15:30,151
You see, your mother
and I were already

436
00:15:30,233 --> 00:15:31,413
planning our wedding

437
00:15:31,495 --> 00:15:32,685
when we found out
that she was 4 months

438
00:15:32,714 --> 00:15:34,024
pregnant with you.

439
00:15:34,107 --> 00:15:35,627
4 months?

440
00:15:35,717 --> 00:15:36,957
But mom looked so skinny in all

441
00:15:36,979 --> 00:15:38,459
your wedding pictures.

442
00:15:38,546 --> 00:15:40,086
That's because she
surrounded herself with

443
00:15:40,113 --> 00:15:44,073
really fat bridesmaids.

444
00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:48,210
Had me pack on 20.

445
00:15:48,295 --> 00:15:50,055
We just never felt it was
something we needed

446
00:15:50,123 --> 00:15:52,173
to share with you.

447
00:15:52,255 --> 00:15:54,205
But it's just so embarrassing.

448
00:15:54,301 --> 00:15:58,131
It really shouldn't
be.[Door opens]

449
00:15:58,218 --> 00:16:02,308
I'll give you two a moment.

450
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:06,006
Just know I was the one
that wanted to tell you.

451
00:16:09,316 --> 00:16:10,816
I suppose your father
already gave you all

452
00:16:10,839 --> 00:16:12,709
the unsavory details.

453
00:16:12,797 --> 00:16:17,107
His years with Phyllis
made him an expert.

454
00:16:17,193 --> 00:16:19,413
What I still can't figure out

455
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:22,630
is why you are obsessed
with rewriting history

456
00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:25,380
to make everything seem perfect.

457
00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:28,342
I'd love to have some
fabulous explanation like,

458
00:16:28,422 --> 00:16:31,212
"I'm an actress and
it's all about illusion."

459
00:16:31,294 --> 00:16:33,214
But that's not it.

460
00:16:33,296 --> 00:16:36,556
Dear, this wasn't about you.

461
00:16:36,647 --> 00:16:39,217
It was about me and my shame

462
00:16:39,302 --> 00:16:43,652
and my need to have
the proper public image.

463
00:16:43,741 --> 00:16:45,611
But more importantly,
I didn't tell you

464
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:47,200
because I didn't want
you to feel like you

465
00:16:47,223 --> 00:16:48,403
were "less than,"

466
00:16:48,485 --> 00:16:50,875
that you were "a mistake."

467
00:16:50,966 --> 00:16:52,916
But by not telling
me, that's exactly how

468
00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:54,142
you made me feel.

469
00:16:54,230 --> 00:16:58,230
I realize that now,
but you gotta know

470
00:16:58,321 --> 00:17:00,631
you were the best thing a
poor girl from rocky mount,

471
00:17:00,715 --> 00:17:02,055
north Carolina,

472
00:17:02,151 --> 00:17:04,461
ever did with her life.

473
00:17:04,545 --> 00:17:08,805
You made me whole.

474
00:17:08,897 --> 00:17:13,157
Oh.

475
00:17:13,249 --> 00:17:15,509
Mom, I appreciate your trying to

476
00:17:15,599 --> 00:17:17,119
protect me,

477
00:17:17,210 --> 00:17:18,490
but I need you to
promise me that

478
00:17:18,559 --> 00:17:19,599
from now on

479
00:17:19,690 --> 00:17:21,390
you're gonna be
completely honest.

480
00:17:21,475 --> 00:17:24,255
With you, yes. I'll try.

481
00:17:24,347 --> 00:17:25,927
But with your father,
it's still gonna be...

482
00:17:25,957 --> 00:17:29,307
Both: "Buy, lie, and deny."

483
00:17:29,396 --> 00:17:32,526
[Both laugh]

484
00:17:32,616 --> 00:17:34,096
And as we approach our goal,

485
00:17:34,183 --> 00:17:38,193
let me remind you what
a great cause this is.

486
00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:40,844
Mona, promise me in the future

487
00:17:40,929 --> 00:17:42,579
you'll tell me everything.

488
00:17:42,670 --> 00:17:43,670
Ok.

489
00:17:43,714 --> 00:17:44,854
You were totally bald

490
00:17:44,933 --> 00:17:49,243
and wore a baby
wig until you were 2.

491
00:17:49,329 --> 00:17:51,899
God, you're just
like your mother.

492
00:17:51,983 --> 00:17:53,723
And don't forget tomorrow,

493
00:17:53,811 --> 00:17:55,201
I'll be doing the weather live

494
00:17:55,291 --> 00:17:57,861
from the cell of the
birdman of Alcatraz.

495
00:17:57,946 --> 00:17:59,816
I'm predicting it'll
be lonely and damp

496
00:17:59,904 --> 00:18:01,434
with no chance of escape.

497
00:18:01,515 --> 00:18:04,995
[Chuckles]

498
00:18:05,084 --> 00:18:06,654
And now, it's my
pleasure to introduce

499
00:18:06,737 --> 00:18:07,907
an amazing talent

500
00:18:07,999 --> 00:18:10,219
and our biggest donor today...

501
00:18:10,306 --> 00:18:13,656
The one, the only
Dee Dee lafontaine!

502
00:18:13,744 --> 00:18:15,314
Dee Dee lafontaine?!

503
00:18:15,398 --> 00:18:18,658
What? Did somebody
say, "send in the clowns"?

504
00:18:18,749 --> 00:18:23,359
[Cheering and applause]

505
00:18:23,450 --> 00:18:26,500
Thank you. And
for my first number...

506
00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:28,673
Her first number?! Oh, hell, no.

507
00:18:28,759 --> 00:18:30,149
I'm going to sing
a wonderful song

508
00:18:30,239 --> 00:18:31,239
of independence

509
00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:32,887
and enduring love.

510
00:18:32,981 --> 00:18:35,111
Maestro.

511
00:18:35,201 --> 00:18:40,291
[You're all I need
to get by begins]

512
00:18:40,380 --> 00:18:42,730
♪ Like the sweet morning dew ♪

513
00:18:42,817 --> 00:18:45,207
♪ I took one look at you ♪

514
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:47,038
♪ and it was plain to see ♪

515
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:49,426
♪ you were my destiny ♪

516
00:18:49,519 --> 00:18:52,609
♪ with arms open wide ♪

517
00:18:52,696 --> 00:18:54,516
♪ I threw away my pride ♪

518
00:18:54,611 --> 00:18:56,701
♪ I'll sacrifice for you ♪

519
00:18:56,787 --> 00:18:59,267
♪ dedicate my life to y... ♪

520
00:18:59,355 --> 00:19:01,575
♪ I will go where you lead ♪

521
00:19:01,662 --> 00:19:04,232
♪ always there in time of need ♪

522
00:19:04,317 --> 00:19:06,407
♪ and when I lose my will ♪

523
00:19:06,493 --> 00:19:08,843
♪ you'll be there to
push me up the hill ♪

524
00:19:08,930 --> 00:19:13,460
Both: ♪ there's no, no
looking back for us ♪

525
00:19:13,543 --> 00:19:15,203
They both have some pipes!

526
00:19:15,284 --> 00:19:17,034
Sing it, sistahs.

527
00:19:17,112 --> 00:19:18,902
♪ ...that's enough ♪

528
00:19:18,983 --> 00:19:19,983
♪ you're all ♪

529
00:19:20,071 --> 00:19:22,771
♪ you're all I need ♪

530
00:19:22,857 --> 00:19:24,417
♪ to get by ♪

531
00:19:24,511 --> 00:19:26,081
♪ like an eagle
protects its nest ♪

532
00:19:26,165 --> 00:19:28,375
♪ for you I'll do my best ♪

533
00:19:28,471 --> 00:19:30,691
♪ stand by you like a tree ♪

534
00:19:30,778 --> 00:19:33,078
♪ and dare anybody
to try and move me ♪

535
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:37,742
Both: ♪ 'cause we, we
got the right foundation ♪

536
00:19:37,828 --> 00:19:39,528
And I married both of them!

537
00:19:39,613 --> 00:19:41,483
What was I thinking?!

538
00:19:41,571 --> 00:19:42,791
♪ ...determination ♪

539
00:19:42,877 --> 00:19:44,437
♪ you're all ♪

540
00:19:44,531 --> 00:19:46,321
♪ you're all I
want to strive for ♪

541
00:19:46,402 --> 00:19:47,932
♪ and do a little more for ♪

542
00:19:48,012 --> 00:19:50,102
♪ all, all the joys ♪

543
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:52,189
♪ under the sun,
wrapped up into one ♪

544
00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:53,708
♪ you're all ♪

545
00:19:53,801 --> 00:19:58,281
♪ you're all I need ♪

546
00:19:58,371 --> 00:20:01,111
♪ you're all I need... ♪

547
00:20:03,767 --> 00:20:06,207
You look so beautiful
in your wedding pictures.

548
00:20:06,292 --> 00:20:07,772
I can barely tell
you're pregnant.

549
00:20:07,858 --> 00:20:10,508
Thank god for cousins who
cheat on weight watchers.

550
00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:12,080
Wait a minute...
Who's this behind

551
00:20:12,167 --> 00:20:13,387
the pillar?

552
00:20:13,473 --> 00:20:14,653
It looks like...

553
00:20:14,735 --> 00:20:16,515
My mom! She was at your wedding?

554
00:20:16,606 --> 00:20:18,126
News to me.

555
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:19,957
But it does explain
who snapped the bride's

556
00:20:20,044 --> 00:20:22,184
head off the wedding cake.

557
00:20:47,289 --> 00:20:49,029
Woman: Woohoo! [Giggling]

558
00:20:49,079 --> 00:20:53,629
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